A Good Friday Meditation… and an Invitation

I received an inspired phone call from a friend yesterday… out of the blue.  She hadn’t read my post from yesterday on forgiveness, but felt inspired to call me and pass along a message that I believe is pivotal in the area of forgiveness and freedom: our self-worth before God.  And yesterday, she wrote these beautiful words on my blog:

“Shalimar, because you asked me to, I will share what I know about deep hurt and forgiveness.  People who are mean are hurting.  That doesn’t change how much I am worth and it doesn’t change how much they are worth.  It is simply an indicator for their suffering.  God has carved my name in the palm of his hand , I am more precious than silver or gold, he has numbered the hairs on my head.  It is a great comfort to me to know that those who hurt me would gladly love me when I am ready to rush back into their arms or understand as I keep them at arms length as I recieve my full healing, so that I may truly love them as Christ has loved me (and I respect them and offer the same).  As Gods people we are created to be in relationship with him and eachother.  That is how we are the happiest.  Forgiveness …what does that word really mean? 

Love sees the best in all things so, in love I say “I don’t understand what you are doing but, I choose to believe you are doing it with the best of intentions and the rest is between you and God”.

Second, it means I will pray blessing over you and your house a hundred times and

Third, I see you as worth as much as me.   Every day I will take this pill of forgiveness and hold everythought captive to the will of God. 

Will I stumble? Of course.  I will fail you Lord and I thank you for your grace, your comfort and your mercy I pray for your full healing Lord for all those involved.  I will simply dust myself off and start over.  I offer forgiveness and freedom as it has been offered to me.  I am weak, I get tired but, I am blessed, God loves weakness and brokenness and he gives rest to the weary, so I work not to beat myself up over it.  I count on and ask my brothers and sisters to pray for me as well that I may accept peace and grow in cultivating the habit of forgiveness and I know I can count on them to be praying a hedge of protection around me in case I get weak.    I am loved, I am worthy of love, and because of Jesus I can offer Agape-the love of God….Beautiful, beautiful Shalimar just be the blessing you are and that cup will overflow like we are promised it will.”

I could not have communicated these thoughts better, and indeed, I am meditating on them today, Good Friday, the Ultimate Day of Forgiveness.

Today begins Mercy Week, where we have a chance to keep in mind forgiveness and mercy for the next 9 days (until Mercy Sunday).  I will be meditating on whom I need to forgive, and I will be writing open letters on this blog to those I am forgiving… but I would like to invite you to do the same.  Do you have someone you need to forgive?  Someone who has hurt you and won’t reconcile with you?  Or someone you are having a hard time forgiving?  Perhaps, we need to forgive ourselves?

I know sometimes many of us are called to keep these thoughts to ourselves, or private… but sometimes there is a grace in getting something out in the open.  I invite you to write, keeping people you are referring to anonymous of course ;), or even being as vague or specific as you feel comfortable with.  Consider this a small group, where there are no judgments, and where most of us might even be strangers.  No negative or judgmental comments will be allowed through at this time 😉

Let’s make a promise to forgive, wholeheartedly, those who have hurt us.  As my friend stated above, we have infinite worth, we are beyond price, and Jesus died for us, the SON OF GOD DIED for us… can we even fathom that?  Let us be FREE!

I will be writing open letters of forgiveness over the next nine days… as my way of freedom and mercy.

Much love, and Good Friday blessings,



10 thoughts on “A Good Friday Meditation… and an Invitation

    1. So glad to be in touch with you, “JMJ”! I am honored that you are here on Life Victorious… and I am hoping you will share some writings of your own, since you are very well-written, judging by what I have read of yours so far! As far as your blog, I actually respect when people are open and honest, even when their opinions may seem shocking to others. Hey it’s what we’re all thinking anyway, right? Many blessings to you!


      1. Thanks again for your kind, encouraging words but I’ll demur on your suggestion that I blog. Perhaps, if this were many years ago when I was nineteen, was sure of and knew so much more than I do now, blogging would be the thing for me to do. But, alas, the years have taken their toll and I’m not nearly as smart, wise and as ready to tell the World so as I was then.



  1. I gave up social networking for Lent, but I’m back here… Happy Easter!
    I will try to put my thoughts together on this.
    Forgiveness has alot to do with letting go. It’s very hard to let go when you don’t want to, and when you want to know “WHY?” the other people stopped talking to you and don’t want to listen to your side of the story (if there’s even a story).
    I had a best friend from 2005-2009. We spent tons of time together, and our children spent tons of time together — probably almost every weekday. When we had to move 12 hours away at the end of 2009, she said she was a terrible long-distance friend. I tried to make it work. When we moved back north (about 2 hours south of said best friend), I thought that 2 hours would be close enough to patch things up, but for some reason it’s not. I am working really hard at being forgiving, but I am not mad at her, so maybe it’s something else. The last time I saw her was just before Christmas, and the last time I talked to her on the phone was New Years’ Eve. I went for spiritual healing in February, and Jesus told me “Friends will come & go.” I thought that was such an odd message for me. I’m having a VERY hard time letting go of this one. I sent her emails, but got nothing in return, so I thought maybe she gave up email for Lent 😉 I called her on Good Friday & left a message. She hasn’t called back yet. I want to be able to listen to the words that Jesus spoke to me and stop worrying, wishing & wondering. I’m sure she needs to forgive me for moving away, even though it was 2.5 years ago. I wonder if there’s a spiritual tie that you can sense when someone isn’t forgiving you for something, and that makes it hard to actually let go. I’ve said prayers to break the soul-ties, but maybe they need to be said more than a handful of times.


    1. Missy, it is so wonderful to have you back! If you don’t mind, I would like to repost what you wrote under “Letters of Forgiveness”… you have such a beautiful, honest heart… thank you for sharing this struggle! Love, shalimamma


  2. I can not come close to the beauty that is expressed here. I am drinking this one in, slowly. I can’t think of anything right now to post for myself, but I have been blessed in reading what has been thus far for this series. I have had some experiences where it was difficult to forgive, but by the Grace of God, that healing has happened and reconciliation was made for most of them. The others, I don’t know where the individuals are now, but for my part I have forgiven, these things formed me and helped me to learn compassion for others, but I can look back and see memory without heat now.

    I have learned that Forgiveness is not a one shot deal. It requires a lot of effort sometimes. It is a daily decision, often with tears and prayer even if you can’t feel it within you or you really would rather not care. You have to make the choice, you are compelled by Love and you must give regardless of your emotion at the time. Our Savior said seventy time seven… sometimes it takes that much.


    1. Hiland Rose, I simply cannot wait to hear your thoughts on forgiveness. Judging by our sisterly link, we probably share a depth in this department… Easters Blessings, and love to you and your family 😉 ~shalimamma


  3. There were two BIG incidents in my life where the people showed no remorse (big to me but don’t mount to a whole hill of beans in this crazy world” in reality). I’d like to note that I think with most people THAT’S when we find it hard to forgive. Most people capable of empathy, will find it hard NOT to forgive a person who shows true remorse (genuinely is sorry and tries very hard not to continue the behavior) It’s when a person hurts you and acts as though you should not be hurt and they did nothing wrong and intend to keep doing it, that we have a hard time forgiving. SO those are the incidents in my life I focus on when forgiveness is brought up. When no remorse was shown.

    These two incidents are separated by 10+ years. I was deeply hurt by people I considered friends even more than friends really, when I was a teen. They I can truly say I have forgiven. I hope they’ve healed and grown out of that behavior and when they come to mind it’s easy to pray for good things for them and I harbor no resentment, ill-will or distaste at a mention of their name. Forgiveness of them came rather suddenly. A holy 2×4. I was at adoration at an awesome conference and I could just clearly hear God say “Let it go” When they would come up in conversation or the event would come up (NOTE: I live in the biggest little town where there’s a LOT of people who know the same people 😉 I couldn’t get the passionate anger going that others still could. I just listened. I didn’t have to lie, I really had just let it go.

    Fastforward 10+ years. Someone close, very close (although this person justifies what happened by saying “We were never THAT close”) hurt me. Hurt me bad. This person not only hurt me, but other family members and my children. Ok maybe my motherly protectiveness of my children, but still, you know what I mean. When they come up in conversation I have to lie when I say “I am over it” or “I hope they are doing well” I have to FORCE, I mean F-O-R-C-E myself to pray for them. Really I don’t want unhappiness in their lives or God to administer vengeance on my behalf, I don’t I am not vengeful either, but I don’t like this person any more can really say I think they are a terrible person. NOT very forgiving is it? I really want that holy 2×4 again. I do. But now you got me thinking. What is the difference in the Shari 10 years ago and the Shari today? NO it’s not that I’m a mama bear and the hurt goes deeper, the hurt maybe a touch deeper but I can’t try to blame it on mama heart or hormones ;). I cant’ help but think it’s where my heart is. My heart isn’t with God as often and as much as it was 10+ years ago. It is harder. I thought I was supposed to grow up and be wiser and I think THAT’S the problem. I’m supposed to be smarter and I think I think I am and it’s hindering my ability to forgive. If you were to ask me if I have forgiven this person I would say yes and think I mean it. But when I examine my behavior I can honestly say, “I’m getting closer but I haven’t yet, I can’t yet” Maybe a step forward is doing this admitting I am having a hard time and need help and time. Thanks for letting me rant here.


    1. Beautiful, Shari, as always… If you don’t mind, I would like to repost this under “Letters of Forgiveness”, and I’ll put my comments there 😉 Love, Shalimamma


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